Saturday, March 28, 2009

Skynet Strikes Again..


Skynet has a new feature where if you input your cell number and personal information, all your "friends" can track you on google maps to see where you are at, by your cell phone. They call it "google latitude". Your cell phone has become the mark of the beast. You should be concerned about this on many levels. Skynet will know where you are at all times, and if that isnt enough to scare you(It is for me, but I don't even trust my dishwasher) Your government will also know where you are at all times, I'm sure somewhere George Orwell is going "HA HA!" in his best nelson voice, as is John Conner. So take my advice for it, or don't its your life.

Monday, March 23, 2009

I want my own satellite.

I fail to understand people that get dressed up in spandex to go ride bicycles on the road. I get the physics of it, less wind resistance, etc. but it makes you look like a douche unless you are in an actual bike race. I just can't wrap my head around the idea of some guy slipping out of his normal person clothes and into some tight fitting spandex super hero outfit just to go out and ride his bike. Wouldn't a normal person get that outfit on, go look in the mirror and think " Oh hell no, I look like a superhero with uut a cape, no way I'm going outside in this hideous costume." I imagine these guys must be single, because no loving wife would let their husband go out in the street in a flourescent body suit. "Hey honey how do I look in my new sweet biking outfit." You look like a fucking dick with a glow in the dark condom on. What the fuck is the matter with you?Thats's what any loving spouse would say. The only sense I can make of it is, nevermind I can't make any sense of it. At least if they would just get a cape to go with the outfit I would think "oh that's not just a douche riding a bike in tights, that is a superhero on his way to save the world.."

On an unrelated side note, I wish to purchase my own satellite. I have no reason for this, other than it would be a cool to say "Well fuck you, I have my own satellite."

Monday, March 9, 2009

Bright spots in an otherwise dark time

The economy is in the shitter, and you might think its all bad but look on the bright side. Somewhere right now there is some out of work outside sales rep, yuppie shit bag who had to start double fisting their Xanax because they have come to the cold realization that they can no longer afford $6 lattees and sweaters for their overpriced barking rat that costs more than most people in the world live on for a year. This pleases me.

The next time you go to your ATM and withdrawal some money you can laugh at the fact that the $1.5o fee you pay is more than a share of their stock.

Smith & Wesson stock is up over 70% year to date while the the market is down over 25%. Don't worry I'm sure its a perfectly normal economic cycle that everyone pulled all their money out of the stock market and bought guns instead. There is probably some cool mad max shit coming soon.

This will be place holder for the blog I didn't write

I was writing a blog and then it got too complicated and frustrating so it looks like it will get filed away in the draft folder with the rest of the garbage(as if the stuff I post isnt bad enough). Leave it to me to overcomplicate a simple idea.

On another note, today is marks the beginning of daylight savings time, an idea thats logic escapes me completely. Thanks to the dipshit that though of this idea, I now have to site here at 12:30 am and not even be tired. Truth is i'm just jeolous because this guy came up with an idea that seems to serve no real purpose except to be annoying, and he got everyone to buy into it. Kudos to him.

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Irony can be a bit confusing at times

But I think this might be a good example.

There is supposed to be tomorrow the largest national protest for global warming in our nations capital (Washington DC for those of you that might be stupid).

Tomorrow we are getting a massive snow storm that reaches all the way to Georgia, in March.

If there is a god I hope he does stuff like this all the time to entertain himself.
 

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